The title of this site is something of a misnomer; there's no actual Fake English on here (yet).
I've long wondered what 'Fake English' - English as spoken by non-English speakers - sounds like. English speakers can pretend to speak foreign languages which would, obviously, sound like gibberish to native speakers.
But what does Fake English sound like?
In the hope of trying to elicit this from the general internet public, I recorded the above video of myself speaking a bunch of phony, accented gibberish in the style Chinese, French, Italian, Russian, Spanish, German and Japanese. So far, the feedback I've got on YouTube has been interesting and encouraging, but there are still no signs of any Fake English!
So, please, if English is your second language, or you know someone who doesn't speak it, please record some Fake English, audio or video, put it on the internet, and let us all know about it here!
Here's the fake dialogue that I wrote for each language. Any similarities to real words are generally coincidental (although, to be fair, I'm familiar to varying degrees with all of them, otherwise it would be hard to fake them - which is why there's no Latvian or Urdu or Navajo on here):
Chinese:Here are some other pages (all on Metafilter) that also consider the question of Pretend English without coming up with any definitive answers:
Wo jiao piang xie? Da tian jiang ger pang ma! Xie ming ma chen ge la. Ne fan de shun weng she.
French:
La maricot de la francheuse est la botonnaisse et la botteneuse. Tot pa plattannie? To pa plattonisme. Hein? Noreune les oides terrianal.
Italian:
Della ma groppoforma di papaligia. E fangelli ma trima, costo mosto: agalla mosto. Pi trima, pa trima.
Russian:
Yuvesh boytnik, graznik -- bohpamoshet badnya. Zet yon a yevleskou groynik. Lepni zet bevchenkski.
Spanish:
Los jungames pala muenos. Copa del jumos pi zampistas: pi querames, pi pleyames, pey gustarañes. !Pi taballyama, pi codo¡
German:
Das grumfph ist peine keirschminte, peine greutzenschtepp. Greutzenschtepp ist peine schweirmarke.
Japanese:
Gore no ho kakkamatsu, gun makahashimu jo. Kotero unitasu hanashi ma? Kaitu moroka. Hun.
128 comments:
When I was a kid I would speak fake english (i'm a spanish native speaker).
I grew up listen to a lot of rock/pop music in my native country and I would pretend I was actually singing them even though I had no idea about what the singer was saying.
There wasn't a recipe for this but usually I would just usually build around the sticky phrases or the chorus and then throw:
i) actual english words I knew from hearing them in the movies or elsewhere that sounded similar to that part of the lyrics I couldn't understand.
ii) made-up words or syllabes (usually suffixes) that sounded english to me like "tion" (as in salvation, education) or gwon, rawn, rine, shein, whop.
Here's my fake english' version of "Rock around the clock" as I would probably sing it when I was 12:
"gwen di round got gwan and the rail gas station, then lone round to the shein wo lation, we ronna rock rock rock the clock tonite, we ronna rock rock rock the clock tonite"
I would've posted a video response in u tube but don't have a cam at the moment. Would've beeen funny though.
Ivan.
Your fake Chinese sounds really funny... :) But good imitation, especially the first two sentences (though I don't think they make any sense). The sound reminded me of traditional Chinese comic dialogues (Xiang Sheng) performed by some native speakers having lived a long time in Beijing (they speak madarin with a lot of 'r's).
My friend (an exchange student from Mexico) can speak English fairly well, but its still hard to understand him at times. I might be able to get him to record some stuff if I bug him enough, but it would be next semester as he's gone home for the holidays.
You've got a real talent for accents - keep it up!
Here's my blog: http://tkdrocker.blogspot.com/
Not related to accents, but perhaps culturally significant (tkd being Korean and all). You might try speaking some fake Korean next (I can say a few phrases and count, but not much.) Good luck with everything!
I am italian. I really liked your site and most of your fake english accents. Quite intersting and funny. The italian fake accents though was not so good. In the beginning I could sort of track something but in the end (before the russian) it really seemed more like hearing another language. What most foreigners tend to do is to exagerate the "musicality" of the language, the singsong way of speaking if you understand what I mean. Even in the south of Italy where this aspect is a more pronounced it is way far from what foreigners tend to do.
Bye
Marco
Hello there. I saw your videos on YouTube and, for some reason, was motivated enough to check out this blog.
I am a native American English speaker, who speaks Japanese fairly well, along with some German and Dutch.
Regarding your Japanese:
There is a problem with your script in the word "kaitu": the sound "tu" does not occur natively in Japanese, ever. The closest thing is "tsu".
Although you have correctly discerned that Japanese sentences often end with particles, your script would sound more convincing with actual Japanese particles. To me, "jo" sounds Korean, and "ma" Chinese. You are better off using "yo" and "ka". Personally, I don't think it breaks the "fake requirement" to do so, since they are only particles. (After all, you use "la" and "les" in your Fake French.)
The "hun" is amusing! In Japanese, it is a sound of acknowledgement or assention, or used to show the speaker is in the process of considering a proposition. You make it sound rather perfunctory, like assenting to a command.
This last observation leads me into what I have noticed throughout your videos (which are nearly all excellent, IMO), namely that whenever you adopt an accent or emulate a language you are always taking on a role, often a very sterotypical one.
For example, your Japanese sounds and looks like you are acting as a soldier. When you do French, you act a bit the intellectual, or maybe the beatnik. When you do Italian, I detect some patrician (plus you emphasize with your hand). Just by watching the shape the area around your mouth takes, I think I could distinguish a lot of them any sound.
I don't say that to criticize (destructlively). But I think it is interesting --- even though I recognize that you have probably picked up most of these accents from media
It also impels me to suggest that perhaps you might improve your accents even further by trying to suppress those stereotypes and body language cues. I can read your Japanese script, for example, much more slowly, precisely and without all the choppiness and still sound perfectly (well, AFAICT! :) Japanese.
Good luck!
P.S. I grew up in California. Would be interested to hear your Californian accents... perhaps "surfer" or "valley girl"? :)
Interesting that there haven't been any video responses. I'm also very curious to actually hear/watch someone faking English.
Recently, Rosie O'Donnell got folks lathered up because she faked Chinese on the "View". Apparently, some thought this is racist, but I wondered if(and assumed that) English is also mimicked.
http://sheruminates.blogspot.com/index.html
Here's my humble contribution. I'm a spanish native speaker. When I was a kid, I would think of English as something like the following: (read it with your standard accent)
"Scrindoes a lan. Merry dressen. Worren sanded singd dudet. wensen jold in".
As for Spanish, I think you made a bad selection of words. Most of the typical sounds are not present. Try the following very quickly... I didn't use any real word.
"Ermato pira la trota de quenaro
faren que perolo satos carinaste
entenado no?"
Spanish pronounciation guide:
- Overpronounce ALL the vowels, remember we only have 5, one for each letter.
- Watch out for the t, s, r and l sounds, which are evidence of an anglo speaker.
hey!!!
THIS IS REALLY URGENT!
I'm in College and I gotta hold a presentaion on Psycholinguistics next week.
On of my points will be that Words can exist without Meaning. We realize them as words even though we don't know their meanings. Your Fake-Languages are just perfect for that so I plan to show your video and let the people guess which languages there are and will tell them afterwards that there was not a single one - but they realized the words!
SO what I need is your video! Perfect would be without the written language name in their?
IS THAT POSSIBLE? Could you send this to me or can I download it anywhere? IT WOULD BE SUCH A GREAT THING!!!!
My email adress:
DKisselbach@web.de
See you!!
hey!!!
THIS IS REALLY URGENT!
I'm in College and I gotta hold a presentaion on Psycholinguistics next week.
On of my points will be that Words can exist without Meaning. We realize them as words even though we don't know their meanings. Your Fake-Languages are just perfect for that so I plan to show your video and let the people guess which languages there are and will tell them afterwards that there was not a single one - but they realized the words!
SO what I need is your video! Perfect would be without the written language name in their?
IS THAT POSSIBLE? Could you send this to me or can I download it anywhere? IT WOULD BE SUCH A GREAT THING!!!!
My email adress:
DKisselbach@web.de
See you!!
Hello Crehquist, I saw your video in French on YouTube. Je suis québécoise et je trouve que votre accent en français est celui d'un allemand (german), because of the "h" you breathe when you finish a word, among other things.
French:
La maricot de la francheuse est la botonnaisse et la botteneuse...
- A date cé déjé compliqué meme pour un francais
(for now, it is verry difficult, even for a french)
...Tot pa plattannie? To pa plattonisme. Hein? Noreune les oides terrianal.
- La je ne comprend plus rien.
(now I do not understand anything)
Vous devriez essayé le Québécois c'est moins difficile.
(you should try in Quebecois "french from Quebec" it is less difficult)
Good luck
Native swede here, I wanna hear some Fake Swedish and i might send you some fake english.
Awesome job!!
Hi, your Russian sounds like Polish. For Americans, probably, it makes no sense but for us there are a lot of significant differences. Your Russian should be named Polish :))
The funny thing is, if he said Polish instead of Russian, all the Poles would be saying, "your polish sounds more russian, you should've called it russian instead.
was that Spanish? It sounded more like French or Italian, which you did particularly well. However, a Spanish accent is different. To hear it better, watch any movie by Almodovar or go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spanish_language.
Several years ago I wondered whether anyone else was interested in making a fake English. Lewis Carroll sort of achieved this with his “‘Twas brillig” text, etc. One way of doing this is to take already existing English words and change one or two sounds: e.g., ‘smoke’ > ‘smope’. That way it's 75% or more already an English word; as with ‘smog’ (‘smoke’ + ‘fog’). You could also try it with spoonerisms: The Strolling Rones (for The Rolling Stones). Very short words like ‘a(n)’ and ‘the’ a kinda hard to shorten and/or change as they are, so you could leave these as they are. Y'know if you make some other fake foreign languages (French, German, etc.) you can go to Babelfish and try to translate them! Some of the text might actually mean something. Best of luck!
Hey, i found you on youtube and i just had to tell you... THERE IS FAKE ENGLISH! Believe me! I am from sweden but i'm right now living in canada.... so i just thought u should know... me and my friends spoke fakeenglish constanty when we were little, cause it sounded "coooool" hahaha... well, with that said i feel like i actually accomplished something today, haha
i don't speak any of those languages too. only your italian and french sounds convincing to me. others are just terrible
Los Ketchup sang the song "Asereje ja deje..." which was meant to be a Spanish speaking Spaniard singing the chorus from an 80s rap song. That's a good indication of how English may sound and be repeated by a non-speaker.
LOL
very well. ridiculously hilarious.
on a side note, has anyone ever told you that you sort of look like Leonardo DiCaprio in some of his movies?
I am a Pole and what I speak may sound like fake English for you. i had a course in English phonetics so I know quite a lot about the RP. If you want me to record myself, e-mail me k.tucholski(at)gmail.com
Hey! I'm French, I saw your videos on Youtube (which made me laugh quite a bit) and I find your stuff really interesting. But I was really surprised by what you said in french cause to be honest, whether it's written or oral, I didn't understand ANYTHING :P I'm sorry to tell you this but the words don't mean anything haha. So the people here saying that the french sounds really convincing, without even being french themwelves, are wrong..
Apart from this, your video on youtube where you speak french is quite good, sounds too german to me, but nice.
hey I'm japanese! and I speak english a little be.
I love ur "fake English" movie.
the japanee one, it sounds funny. it is true that japanese sounds like it when it is spoken in American movie like "Pearl Habor".
Anyway, I just love it. Other ones, too.
I am Japanese and I thought your fake Japanese sounded like almost real Japanese to me. Here's a tip for you, though. If you avoid r's and end with 'su,' 'ta,' 'yo,' 'ka,' or 'ne,' you'll sound more authentic. There are quite a few gender differences in spoken Japanese, and, the most interesting thing is that you sounded a lot more masculine than any of my non-Japanese male friends when they speak Japanese.
Hi, Stefano Perelli is writing from Rome!
Your video is fantastic!
Most of all you italian is quiet "true", if you're not a native you may think it is italian for real!
VERY IMPRESSIVE
Hello, i like your videos on youtube very much. Im from Germany, so your German video is my favorite. I have been learning English at Gymnasium for 6 years and now im a student at university and my second subject is English (BE). It is very hard indeed to speak good English for German native speakers. So in my free time i still go to "pronunciation & intonation class", because it s not that easy and you always have to keep it going. If you dont, you will soon start to make mistakes. I will introduce your videos to my linguistic class. Lets see how they will like that.
With best regards
Julia
really amazing! i love it!
Chinese & accent ok
French & accent nok
Italian & accent ok
Russian & accent ok
Spanish & accent ok
German & accent ok
Japanese & accent nok
?why?
in my opinion , french and japanese hav no really accent !
there is a guy on the german version of "american idol" who sings an english song without knowing the right words. that sounds very much like fake english.
http://de.youtube.com/watch?v=JeLh_csx8uc
if the link doesnt work try searching for "dsds manuel bauch"
have fun.
Very good job , mate.
I always wanted to do something like this, escpeially with cockney rhyming.
A good scots film to refer to is "Sweet Sixteen" for glaswegian.
How about some Canadian, Bermudan or Kiwi accents ?
I find it incredible that you have the gall to label the English spoken by Indians as fake english. Some of the finest authors writing in English today were born and bred in India.
What's even funnier is that you appear to think that even Londoners and Australians speak 'fake' english. What should we surmise from this? Do you mean to say that anyone who speaks English without an American accent is 'pretending' to speak English or in other words, everyone apart from Americans are faking it, as it were?
I think you need to quit watching too many movies and start do some travelling!
Hey there--
I'm an avid amateur linguist, foreign language learner, and accent aficionado. I can't claim the breadth of ability you have with accents (I saw some of your English accent attmepts, and was quite impressed...I'm an American, as a reference point...)
I am fluent in German, Italian and French, and have been told I have a native German accent, an acceptably American-accented Italian, and an OK french accent (the French are unforgiving though...), and I was very impressed with your fake French and Italian. Your German is a bit lacking, I think maybe if you looked for some examples of Bavarian dialect speech and tried to emulate the "L"'s, it might help a lot--German L's can almost morph to an "i/y", and that adds a lot to the imitation.
Your japanese wasn't bad, but you should note that there really isn't an "sh" sound in japanese, it's more halfway between a pure S and SH...you should also end phrases with the sound "mahssss" as all japanese present tense verbs end with -masu ("u" is never pronounced) There were a couple of other things I wanted to mention, but they slipped my mind while I was writing about German etc.
Also, your interest in what fake English sounds like is a question I've had since I was a child but have never found addressed anywhere (in fact, most people just gave me a strange look when I would broach the subject...)
Please do shoot an email to LTurechek at geemayll dot comm, I'd be very interested to discuss these topics further.
-Luke
Poor.
Hello, you might start by actually reading some of the comments left by offended people on your German Accent video. Several of them mention how stupid the American accent sounds, both in English and German.
Painter1994 says: wenn ich mir eine kartoffel in den mund stecken würde,würde ich auch einen amerikanischen akzent haben.aber so reden will ich nicht"
If I stuck a potato in my mouth, I could have an American accent too! But why would I want to talk like that.
Hey!! I love your videos!!
They're very funny. You're awesome!!Keep it up! =]
You're too cute!!!
Andrea from Germany ;)
You're too cute!!!
Andrea from Germany ;)
You're too cute!
I did not understand anything of you spanish words. Nonsenses.
Anyways, really interesting your project ;)
Congrats ^_^
I didn't understand what you say in Spanish.
Nice blog. You should try a Kansas accent :)
greetings
Fun to see the dialogue you wrote for the fake languages video! I also would LOVE to see videos of people speaking fake English.
this is slightly off topic but, these are indian music videos with gibberish - random english words. its pretty funny...
http://livingwithstyle.com/1869955992-indian-music-videos-fake-english.html
http://livingwithstyle.com/1869955992-indian-music-videos-fake-english.html
It seems like a lot of these people aren't really getting the point.
HE IS NOT SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGES.
He is speaking gibberish, nonsense sounds, but attempting to speak them using other languages' stereotypical meter and inflection.
The problem with anybody responding on this is that those who can read and understand you probably 'do' speak English, and therefore cannot create "Fake English" any better than the original poster.
Well, I liked all your fake languages, but the German ( I am a German native speaker) sounded not really authentic. I guess Italians, Russians and all others think the same about their languages.
Well probably you already know this;)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQt-h753jHI
Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!
Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now. Keep it up!
And according to this article, I totally agree with your opinion, but only this time! :)
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Steve Landesberg, an actor who was a regular on the US tv series Barney Miller in the 70s, could speak in fake languages, including English. He said his fake English sounded rather like a dog barking. I think this was on the Johnny Carson show, many years ago.
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